Smelly Sheep Claims Preaching Better on TV than from Pulpit

By The The Pope’s Fool News Service
October 23, 2014

The Popes Fool News Service (We Make Stuff Up)CHICAGO, IL (TPF) — This just in, from our correspondent on the ground amongst the cohort of the smelly sheep on the margins of the Roman Catholic faithful, speaking to Lily Lonigan, a sixty-something Catholic who works at the Polkadot Shamrock Bar, Internet Cafe and Daycare Center. “You know, I watched a rerun of the show Bones on TV last night, and I swear, it was the best sermon I’ve heard in years. Certainly better than anything I hear up there,” she said, pointing her thumb up the road to the local Catholic Church, Saints Melodius and Catheter. “So there was the usual grisly murder they had to forensically solve, but as that played out, Bones was oddly secretive about the whereabouts of her partner and mate Seeley Booth, saying only that he was at the hospital. Of course everyone was worried about the situation during the whole episode,” she continued, “but at the end Bones reveals to her friend that Booth was volunteering to help little kids with brain tumors, and had organized a carnival for them. When asked why Booth kept it a secret, Bones, who is an atheist, responded by quoting First Corinthians, 13:4. ‘Charity suffers long and is kind, charity envies not, charity brags not itself, it is not puffed up,’ she says, and explains that Booth takes that to mean that real charity is anonymous. She says Booth didn’t even want her to know. Not bad, huh?” Lily concluded. “A fine example of the natural law in action. Maybe the yokes up the road ought to take a lesson or two from the big bad secular world with its evil agendas and dictatorships of relativism. They might keep more people in the pews if they did.”